Say You Loved Me
by BlueroseSnow
Summary: Ten years since they first met as Ladybug and Chat Noir, six years since they defeated Hawkmoth, four years since they revealed their identities to one another and two years since they last spoke in spired by the songs 'Say You Wont Let Go' by James Arthur and 'I Wish You Loved Me' by Tynisha Keli Post Reveal
1. (I) Miss Him

**This is NOT a songfic! Music and lyrics are placed simply to set the mood of the story.**

**Other than that enjoy another Miraculous story!**

**Song: 'I Wish You Loved Me' by Tynisha Keli**

_(I) Miss Him_

_Something, Something as simple as me hearing your name_

_Puts me, Puts me in a place that I can't even explain_

"Hey Marinette? Did you know that Adrien was back in town?" Alya asked

I froze at the sound of hearing his name. I haven't seen the man in almost two years and yet the mere mention of him was still able to make me weak at the knees. "No...I didn't...when is he coming back?"

"Sometime today, Nino's actually on his way to pick him up from the airport as we speak."

"How long did you know about this?"

"Just a few minutes, I was talking to him on the phone and he told me. He was SUPPOSED to keep it a secret apparently, but you know how bad he is at that." She laughed. "I told him tha he should bring him so we can all catch up at the coffee shop. You want to come?"

The last time I saw Adrien was at the New year's ball two years ago. He invited us all there and even said he had something important to tell me. Over the past years our friendship had became something more. Upon discovering that he was Chat Noir and him finding out I was Ladybug after we finally defeated Hawkmoth.

_I really didn't know back then_

_But right now I am totally sure_

_Baby I know I'm your friend_

_But I wanna be much more_

I had always had some sort of feelings for Chat that I didn't quite understand and it always made me question my feelings for Adrien, but now that I knew the truth it made sense. I was in love with the same man this whole time.

Sadly, it wasn't the case vice versa. At the New Year's ball I went to meet Adrien on the rooftop like he had asked and when i got there he wasn't alone.

With him was Kagami, a girl that he had once stated he had feelings for back in the day and if that's not the worse part about this then it was definitely what they were doing that was.

They were kissing...or at least she was kissing him, it didn't look like he was returning the gesture, but at the same time he wasn't pushing her away either.

I was confused, broken, and hurt all at the same time. I stepped back into the shadows, they hadn't noticed me arrive so I used that to my advantage and left the scene, completely leaving the party that night.

Two weeks later, he was on a flight to England for college and it was rumored that him and Kagami were in a relationship.

Chat had confessed to me multiple times in the passed and I've always rejected his affections and even after knowing the truth I still didn't do anything about it.

I guess it was never meant to be...

Yet, despite how much it hurted to see him with someone and how it still hurts thinking about it now...I really do miss him.

"Yeah I'll come." I finally agreed

Alya raised an eyebrow at my answer. "You don't seem like you're sure."

"I guess I'm just nervous since it's been so long since the two of us spoke."

"Well I'm sure he'll be ecstatic to see you again." She picked up her purse. "Come on let's get to the shop and meet them there."

As I sat at a table with Alya waiting for the boys to arrive I couldn't help the nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach. Just how would I react to seeing Adrien after two years? How would HE react seeing ME?

I tried to keep my cool so I wouldn't raise any suspicions from Alya, but the longer I sat here waiting for the very man who I tried to bury my feelings for and fail. I was beginning to lose it a little.

Alya stared at me while taking a sip of her cappuccino. "Hey Mar? Are you really that nervous about seeing Adrien again?" I shrugged and took a sip of my drink. "Do you still have feelings for him?"

I nearly choked. "What do you mean?" She raised an eyebrow at me and I sighed. "I'm...not sure how I feel about him now. I mean it's been two years and...I don't he has interest in me anymore."

"Anymore?"

"Uh...I mean if he DID have an interest I doubt it's still there."

"Well...maybe that's something the two of you could possibly talk about." Alya's attention was caught by something at the entrance. "Speakimg of the devil..."

I turned around to see what Alya was looking at and I felt my breath hitch slightly.

_I get butterflies when I see you coming_

_Oh boy you got me running_

_This feeling in my stomach_

_Tells me I should be your woman_

Entering the store was Adrien with Nino right beside him and may I just say I didn't think it was even possible for this man to be any more handsome than he was two years ago. How was that even physically possible?!

My hearts beating faster the closer he gets and I feel like I might pass out right here at this very moment. Why in the world does he have this effect on me?

For a second we made eye contact and it felt like an eternity. He blinked, probably surprised to see here, then he did something that I didn't expect him to do after not seeing or speaking to him for two years.

He smiled at me.

_Cause your the only one who makes my fairytale come true_


	2. I (Wish) Things Were Different

**Plenty of you have asked me to continue and have suffered from waiting so here is the next chapter.**

**Tbh I already have this whole story planned out it's only 10 chapters long lol**

**Enjoy!**

**Song: I Wish You Loved Me by Tynisha Keli **

_I (Wish) Things Were Different_

I never thought I'd feel so out of place sitting here with my friends. We've always had the best time and conversations with the four of us, but I can't seem to put away my feelings long enough to just enjoy it.

I can't stop stealing glances towards his direction and I barely have said a word to him in short of 'hello.' I honestly didn't think it was possible, but Adrien looks even more handsome than when I saw him two years ago.

Calm down Marinette.

"So Adrien how was your flight? What exactlyare you studying over there in good ol England." Alya asked.

"It was fine, nothing special really I'm used to plane rides ya know?" He took a sip of his coffee and continued. "You guys know how much I loved school as a kid so I'm studying to become a teacher. I want to help the next generation exceed the same way Ms. Bustier helped us."

A teacher, I can see him doing that. He really is great with kids and it makes me wonder if he ever planned on having his own one day.

Wait...what am i thinking?

"So what are you guys up to?" Adrien asked.

"I've got an internship at the broadcast station." Alya said excitedly "You're looking at the next Nadia Chamack of Paris News."

"How about the first Alya Cesaire?" Nino said smiling at Alya. "I think i like her a lot better."

"You're cute. Tell Adrien about your gig."

Nino shrugged. "It's nothing special, I work part-time as a DJ. I do parties, clubs and other stuff like that. I'm currently working on a new mixtape, but I'm not sure if it'll take off."

"Of course it will Nino." Alya insisted.

"You're music is amazing Nino. You should have more confidence in it, you'll do great I'm sure." I spoke up as well.

"She's right." Adrien said and pat Nino on the shoulder. "You should have more faith in your talent."

Nino rubbed the back of his neck looking slightly embarrassed from our compliments. "Thanks dudes, it really means alot."

Our conversations continued and for a moment I felt my anxieties slipping away, that was until...

"So Marinette? What have you been up to these days?" I looked up at Adrien's eyes that were now staring in my direction. He was sporting that gorgeous smile of his and I felt my heart about to explode.

I took a few seconds to try to calm down so I wouldn't completely sound like an idiot trying to answer his question. "Nothing special really, I'm still trying to become a fashion designer." I chuckled nervously "I'm taking classes on fashion and design at the moment and I've applied for a few internships."

"Nothing special? You're finally going after your dream Marinette." His smiled brightened. "I think you're amaz...I mean that's...that's really amazing." He picked up his drink taking a long sip as he seemingly glared at the table and it almost looked like his face was turning red.

Alya's phone buzzed and she pulled it out to read her message. "Oh crap, I forgot I have to be at the station in the next 20 minutes." She got up from her seat. "Im really sorry guys, I really wish I could hang, but I gotta bounce."

"I'll give you a ride." I said about to get up from my seat.

"No it's fine, Nino can drive me." She said pulling him out of his seat. "He's got a gig happening over at the area later and he has to go and do a sound check before it starts. Right Nino?"

"Y..Yeah that's right. Sorry dudes." I noticed a single sweat dropping from the side of his face. Something very suspicious was going on here.

"Since it's your day off Mari why don't you guys enjoy the rest of the day, we'll catch up with you onceour works done." Alya smiled, and walked around the table to hug Adrien. "Nice seeing you again Agreste." Adrien returned her hug and then Alya walked over to me. "...and one for my best friend."

When Alya pulled me into an embrace she whispered into my ear.

"Talk to him." she says before pulling away and giving an innocent smile.

The more I think about it the more I can see that the two of them were deliberately trying to set me up by leaving me here alone with Adrien. I glared at Alya's retreating figure, if she could feel it I couldn't tell cause her and Nino happily left the shop.

Adrien and I sat back down and let the awkwardness from our silence begin to sink in. I didn't know what to say to him now that we were alone. I didn't know if i SHOULD or if I even WANTED to.

"So Mari?" He started, breaking me from my thoughts. "How have you been?"

"I'm...fine..." Not sure if I was telling the truth.

He nodded "That's good..."

The silence was back again, this time twice as awkward as the previous one. I looked at Adrien who was once again staring at the table while twiddling his fingers. I guess I wasn't the only one who couldn't figure out what to say.

Still I can't help noticing the fluttering feeling in my chest at just the mere sight of him.

_How can someone make me so sad_

_But still I only want you to stay_

_I wanna say "I love you" so bad_

_But I don't wanna scare you away_

Is it really possible that I could still have those feelings that I've tried so hard to bury?

Adrien nervously reached up and rubbed the back of his neck. "It's been a long time hasn't it...since we've seen each other and...talked."

I nodded and pulled a loose strand of my hair back. "Yeah...it's been awhile."

"I missed you." My heart stops and for a second I thought I misheard what he said, that is until I saw the serious expression on his face. "I missed you alot...I'm not sure what happened between us these past couple of years, but I do know that you mean a lot to me Marinette and I don't want to lose you." His face turned slightly red, most likely matching my own. "Do you think we could...continue where we left off...and still be friends?"

Friends...that's right. No matter what I feel, no matter what I do, he and I will never be more than that...friends.

All those times back then when he claimed to love me as Ladybug doesn't exist anymore now that he knows the real me.

Yet I do have to admit I did miss our friendship. I missed the fun hangouts as with him as Adrien and the joking on the rooftops when he was Chat Noir. If I can get that back...I guess being just friends is enough. Even if I know we'll never be more.

_Please_

_I wish that you'll understand_

_That I wanna be more than just your friend_

"We're still friends Adrien, we never stopped being that." I say, which in a way was the truth. Yeah I was hurt with what happened at the New Years ball, but I never wanted to break our friendship. His feelings are his own no matter what mine are. "I was dealing with some stuff back then I guess and I wasn't sure how to cope with it, but now I know that I was being ridiculous."

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked curiously.

"Not neccessary." I reached over and rested my hand over his. "It's not important, lets just take our friends advice and enjoy this day. Shall we?"

"That sounds great." His smile brightened, making my heart jump once again. "How about we find a more private place to talk so our kwamis can catch up too?"

"That sounds like a plan." We stood up from our seats and headed towards the exit.

Adrien steeped forward and opened the door for the two of us. "After you M'lady." He says jokingly.

I rolled my eyes at him, but thanked him nonetheless and we both headed towards the park.

_I wish you loved me_


	3. (You) Don't Know

**Part 3 here, probably a little sooner than I expected.**

**Song: I Wish You Loved Me by Tynisha Keli**

_(You) Don't Know_

Adrien and I sat on a secluded bench in the park. We scoped the area making sure that no figures were in sight before we allowed our kwamis to appear out into the open. Tikki sat on my shoulder and Plagg rested on Adrien's knee.

"It's nice to see you again Sugarcube." Plagg said with a grin.

My kwami rolled her eyes. "How many times do I have to tell you not to call me Sugarcube?"

"As many times as you want. Too bad it's not going to get me to stop." Plagg said with a chuckle, but recieved no response from Tikki. "Oh come on, don't sit there and pretend you didn't miss me."

"Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. You'll never know you silly cat." Tikki playfully stuck her tongue out and Plagg pouted.

I giggled at our kwamis exchanges, until I noticed Adrien looking at my direction. He was smiling at me and I felt a little nervous under his gaze.

He continued to stare, so I felt that I should say something. "Is something wrong Adrien?"

He blinked and immediately looked away. "N..No nothing's wrong I'm just..." he sighed. "I'm wondering if I should go see my father."

Finding out that Gabriel Agreste was Hawkmoth was a huge shock to anyone in the city who knew his name. Yes, I had always suspected it, but it wasn't anythin like seeing the truth for myself.

And Adrien...poor sweet Adrien, he's had to suffer with the truth more than anyone else. Finding out that his father was the one spreading chaos throughout the city and his mother was lost in the process. In the state he was in, it's a miracle that he was able to get through it.

"If you want I'll go with you." I said reaching out for his hand and taking it in mine. "I know it's hard, giving everything that's happened, but you don't have to be alone. I'll be by your side whenever you need me to be."

My heart jumped seeing his smile, but this time I didn't mind. "Thanks princess. You always did seem to know what to say to make me feel better."

I felt myself blushing at his words. Then his phone buzzed and he pulled it out to check his message. When he unlocked it my heart dropped to what was on screen.

It was only a few seconds, but I was able to catch the list of messages covering the entire phone and they were all paired with a female name.

Brittany, Stephanie, Michelle, Amanda, all saying how they missed him and they hoped to see him again. Then there was the most recent message, the one he was responding to.

Kagami

_I see, I see you talking to them girls on your phone_

_I wish that I could tell them all to leave you alone_

Of course, what else did I suspect? Who else could he possibly be talking? Adrien was perfect, he was bound to catch the attention of every eligible girl he meets. I could never compare.

I slowly removed my hand away from Adrien and scolded myself for even considering the possibility that things could ever change.

"Sorry, I guess people found out about my arrival sooner than I hoped." He said putting his phone away. "A photographer must have caught my picture somewhere."

"You don't think they're taking pictures of us right now do you?" I asked out of fear due to our kwamis exposure.

"No it must have been from earlier. I don't word would have gotten out that fast." He chuckled again. "Besides even if they did, kwamis can't be photographed or recorded remember?"

I nodded, I guess that means we're okay, but it still doesn't help the aching feeling in my chest seeing all those messages. Has Adrien had other girlfriends while he was away? Are him and Kagami back together? Did they ever stop dating in the first place?

Is this my punishment for never giving Chat Noir a chance?

_Really didn't know back then_

_But right now I'm totally sure_

_That I wanna be much more_

"So...um..how is Kagami doing?" I'm not sure why I'm asking this. I just felt like I needed to know where their relationship stood.

"I'm not sure." He replied. "I haven't talked to her in awhile I've only just gotten a text from her now."

Okay...so that means they aren't dating then, but it doesn't mean they still aren't heading in that direction.

_I never really liked your girlfriends_

_Never really gave them a chance_

What am I thinking? It's none of my business who Adrien dates. I really do need to get my feelings in check and to do that I think I need to distance myself from Adrien for awhile.

"Well I'm sure you'd like to go see everyone now so I wont take anymore of your time." I stood up from the bench. "My car's not too far from here, I'll take you anywhere you need to go."

"Marinette wait!" He grabbed my arm halting my movement entirely and I looked back to see what was the matter. His face was red and he looked embarrassed, but still held my arm gently. "Actually I still have time, I don't have to really be anywhere for a few hours. I'd really like to talk to you some more...if you don't mind."

I wanted to say 'no.' I SHOULD have said 'no' and yet something entirely different left my mouth instead. "Okay...what do you want to do?"

"Do you think maybe we could stop by your parents bakery?" He asked grinning down at me. "I've been dying to have one of their croissants again and Plagg really missed eating your homemade cheese bread."

There was something off about his request. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was making up ways to keep me around for as long as possible.

And yet, I can't fight off the want to be around him as well.

"Okay." I said. "We can do that."

"Great!" Adrien let go of my arm and grabbed my hand instead. "You said your car was nearby right?"

I blinked at our hands entwined, but shook of the heated feeling. "Yeah, it's right around the corner."

Adrien began to drag me out of the park and I was given no choice, but to follow. As we walk, I couldn't deny how right it felt to have him close to me like this with our hands linked together.

_Cause I realized that I'm your woman_

_Your woman_


	4. I Really (Loved) You

**Song: I Wish You Loved Me by Tynisha Keli**

_I Really (Loved) You_

After we ate with my parents and they practically attacked Adrien with greetings and affection. I was finally taking him back to Nino's place. On the way we started reminiscing about old akumas in the car and all the other adventures we had.

"Remember when Mr. Pigeon used to just like pigeons?" Adrien said with a laugh. "Who would have thought that he out of all people would have turned into Monsieur Rat?"

I laughed at the memory. "We'll we did tell him to find a new animal to befriend. I just wish he chosed a cuter one with less...diseases."

"I recall someone turning into a cute little mouse to save us one time though." Adrien said with his playful tone. "Isn't that right Mousinette?"

When I looked over at him he gave me a wink, fighting the blush I scoffed at his comment. "It was a one time thing okay? You of all people know why I had to do it."

"Yeah I know, but that doesn't mean you didn't still look adorable with your little Minnie mouse hairstyle."

"Oh my god, will you stop?" I giggled, but still felt my face burning. "You are such a dork."

"You know I'm right M'lady...you're blushing." It's official, this man is trying to kill me.

Thankfully we finally arrived in front of Nino's place. I parked in front of the complex and we both exited out of the car.

"So you're staying with Nino while you're here?" I asked curiously.

Adrien nodded. "Yeah, it's better than being in some fancy five star hotel by myself. Plus it'll be harder for the paparazzi to find me." He makes his way around the car and stands in front of me. "I really had a great time with you today Mari."

"Yeah...me too." Maybe today wasn't so bad after all. Despite the constant jumping of my heart, I really do enjoy spending time with him.

I'm perfectly fine with just being his friend...right?

_How can someone make me so sad_

_But still I only want you to stay_

_I wanna say "I love you" so bad_

_But I don't wanna scare you away_

_Please I wish that you'll understand_

_That I wanna be more than just your friend_

_I wish you loved me_

"Well...I'll see you around Adrien." I turned to take my leave, but I was stopped when he suddenly grabbed a hold of my hand.

"Before you go..." he said, "Mari there's something I need to tell you."

_Said if you really love somebody_

_I mean really really really really love somebody_

_Let me hear you say yeah_

"What's wrong Adrien?" Not sure what's happening all of a sudden, but if Adrien needs help then damn sure I'm going to help him.

"Well it's just I've been wanting to tell you this for a long time now." He squeezed my hand and suddenly my heart starts to race at what he might say.

_Let me hear you say yeah yeah_

I can see that he's slightly red in the face and clearly having trouble saying what he what's to say, but then there's this glint in his eyes as he suddenly becomes determined to finish what he aas trying to say.

_If you really know you need him_

_And you know deep down your never gonna leave him_

_Let me hear you say yeah yeah yeah_

"Marinette..." he breathed my name.

_Hear you say yeah_

"...I'm...I'm in love with you." I blinked clearly shocked, I wasn't expecting that, nor do I believed that I heard what I just heard. Did he just...?

"You..love me?" I repeated, because I wasn't sure I can trust my ears right now, or my heart.

"Yes...I do." He says with a confidence that was only ever seen in him. "I've loved you since the moment I met you."

I'm trying so hard to wrap my mind around this right now. "I'm sorry, but I don't understand...didn't you say earlier that-"

"I know I said for us to start again as friends, but I cant deny how I feel." He took my other hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Being with you today, spending time with you, it reminded me why I fell in love with you in the first place." He held my hands closed to his heart and I can feel it beating almost as fast as mine. "I want to be with you Marinette there's no one else I'd rather be with."

My heart is racing like crazy. There was nothing more in the world that I wanted, but to hear him say those words. I wanted to kiss him tight now, to melt in his arms and think about the entire future we could have together, but...I can't forget.

Images of the New Year's ball keep flashing in my head, seeing him with Kagami. Those messages from all those girls who clearly want him. There's no way...there's no way he'd choose me.

No one is that lucky...I'M not that lucky.

"N..No.." I took my hands away from his. "...you're lying."

Adrien blinked surprised. "What?"

"You don't really feel that way Adrien."

"Marinette I'm telling you the truth." He reached out to me and I pulled away.

"I know what I saw at the New Years Ball Adrien. I know what you're saying isn't."

He looked slightly confused for a second. "Mari...what are you tal-"

"Besides it doesn't matter even if what you're saying is true, even if you think that what you're saying is true it doesn't matter." I decided I didn't want this to continue so I did what I had to do. "I'm...not in love with you anymore." Adrien stood there shocked, his expression turned into one of hurt and I could take seeing him like that. "I'm sorry...I...I have to go."

I turned away and hurried into the driver's seat of my car, without looking back I started the engine and begin to drive away, but that didn't stop me from looking in my rearview mirror as Adrien watched my car drive away.


	5. What's Wrong With (Me)?

**We still got five more chapters to go, but this will be the last chapter with Mari's POV**

**Once again the song that inspired these past chapters is called 'I Wish You Loved Me' by Tynisha Keli**

**Go check it out on YouTube, Spotify or wherever you go to to listen to music.**

**Enjoy!**

_What's Wrong With (Me)?_

_How can someone make me so sad_

_But still I only want you to stay_

_I wanna say "I love you" so bad_

_But I don't wanna scare you away_

_Please I wish that you'll understand_

_That I wanna be more than just your friend_

_I wish you loved me_

I don't know where I am right now or where I'm even trying to go. I just kept driving and driving without no real destination in mind. Eventually, I gre tired and moved the car to the side of the rode before turning off the engine. I laid my head on the wheel and began to cry right there in the driver's seat.

Why did I say that to him? Why did I tell him that I didn't love him when I know for a fact that wasn't true. What is wrong with me?

Hearing him confessing to having feelings for me was everything I ever wanted and more, but with just a few words I managed to throw it all away in an instant.

I was afraid of getting hurt all over again like before. I didn't want a repeat of those feelings and the pain that came with it. Yet, it still feels like I'm experiencing that pain all over again.

"Marinette? Are you okay?" I lifted my head and Tikki was hovering above the wheel.

I shook my head, "Not exactly..."

Tikki gave a sympathetic look, "Marinette...do you really believe Adrien would lie about loving you?"

"I...I don't know Tikki." I leaned back in my seat. "I don't believe that he would lie to me like that, but he also could be fooling himself into thinking that he feels that way. We were always such great friends...what if he decides later down the line that that's all he wants to be and finds someone else?"

"You're assuming the worst case scenarios without even thinking of all the wonderful things that could come out of being with him. You'll never know how far the jump is if you don't take a leap Marinette."

"I just don't want to get hurt again."

"Don't you think Adrien's hurting just as much as you right now?" Tikki asked. "He's the one that got rejected in the end."

She's right...in the end Adrien was the one who was completely open with his feelings and I was the one who shot him down. I'm so worried about the thought of being rejected by him, but he was the only one who was rejected.

I don't know how to fix this...I don't know if I CAN fix this or if I should. I can't change the past...I can only see where the road is going to take me from here.

After hours of driving trying to find my way back, I finally entered a familiar part of the city and proceeded to navigate myself the rest of the way back.

I pulled out my keys, unlocked the door and entered the apartment. Once I was inside, Alya came rushing from around the corner and attacked me with a hug.

"Girl, where the hell have you been I've been worried sick!" She frantically spoke. "Adrien said you ran off somewhere and you weren't answering your phone."

During my attempt of finding my way back into the city, my phone had died in the car and I didn't even bother to charge it. "Sorry Alya, I kind of...got lost making my way back and I didn't realize my phone had died." I stated apologetically.

Alya sighed and shook her head, "I swear you're going to give me a heart attack one of these days."

"Again I'm really sorry." I smiled nervously and yawned. "Hey, I'm put on my pajamas and head off to bed. Can we talk in the morning?"

"Wait girl, hold up." She said stopping me. "First, tell me how your day with Adrien went. You guys had fun right?"

I sighed, "I really don't want to talk about it right now..."

She frowned at my statement. "That bad?"

"I'll tell you abput it in the morning. Right now I just need some sleep..."I began to make my way to my room, but turned around to say one more thing. "Oh, and next time you and Nino want to set me up on a date. Can you do me a favorite and not be incredibly obvious about it or maybe just not do it at all?"

Alya gave a wide eyed expression, but then brushed it off acting completely innocent. "Pfft, what are you talking about Marinette? I wasn't trying to set you up, don't be ridiculous..."

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't contain my slight smile. "Goodnight Alya."

After I took a shower and put on my pajamas, I got into bed and made myself comfortable under the comforter. For a few minutes I laid there staring at the ceiling still thinking about what I said to Adrien, that I didn't love him, and how big of a lie that truly was.

I remember fantasizing about having an entire life with that man. I imagined us getting married and even designed what my wedding dress would look like. We'd go on our honeymoon to a different country or to some tropical island. We'd have three kids, two boys and a girl and we would love them so much. We'd have a dog, maybe a cat, but then again we already have Plagg, and maybe we'd get that hamster too. I don't know why I love hamsters so much.

Some say when you can picture living the rest of your life with a person, that's how you know you're in love with them.

I turned to my side and a tear falls from my eye. I do still love him so much, but it's too late now. If there was any possibility of having that future with Adrien before, I don't I'll ever get that chance again after today.

I wonder how he feels about me now...

_How can someone make me so sad_

_But still I only want you to stay_

_I wanna say "I love you" so bad_

_But I don't wanna scare you away_

_Please I wish that you'll understand_

_That I wanna be more than just your friend_

_I wish you loved me_


	6. (Say) It Wasn't True

**The second half of the story starts...NOW!**

**Song: Say You Wont Let Go by James Arthur**

**Also dont drink and drive kids unless the plot demand you too, which it never does so DON'T DO IT**

_(Say) It Wasn't True_

_I met you in the dark, you lit me up_

_You made me feel as though I was enough_

I still love her...I never stopped and I doubt that I ever will. Since the moment I laid eyes on her eye knew she was special and there was nothing I could do to stop my adoration from growing.

Being a hero and saving the day as Chat Noir were the best times of my life, cause it meant I could be with her by her side. After my Hawkmoth's...my father's defeat, it took awhile until we were able to built up the courage to reveal ourselves to one another, and I was finally able to see her...really see her for the first time.

I admit I hadn't expected it to be Marinette, mainly cause there were too many signs that told me she wasn't, but once I saw the truth. I couldn't imagine how it could have possibly been anyone else.

Marinette was the kindest person I knew, she was always so willing to help others and had shown bravery in some of the most dangerous situations. If I'm to be honest, I actually started developing a crush on her going into highschool...but I ignored those feelings on the account that I loved Ladybug and come to find out they were one and the same all along.

It was the happiest feeling I've had in awhile. After discovering that my father was Hawkmoth and that my mother was...gone...it tore me apart. I felt like I was crumbling from the inside and I didn't know how to stop it.

Marinette was there to pick up the pieces. Ladybug didn't know Chat Noirs relationship to Gabriel Agreste, but Marinette knew Adrien's. She was supportive throughout it all, and tried her best to keep me smiling. Without realizing it, I fell further and further for her in the midst of it all.

Finding out that Ladybug was one of my closest friends was the highlight of my life and it took all of my willpower from kissing her senselessly right there.

I wanted to do this right, I took time to get used to the knowledge that she was Ladybug, and she got used to knowing that I was Chat Noir. We grew so much closer, both as superheroes and as friends and our bond had never been stronger. Finally I decided that I wanted to be so much more, so I planned on confessing my feelings to her at the annual New Years ball.

Halfway through the ball I asked her to meet me on the rooftop. I wanted to tell her how I felt and I hoped with all my heart that she would return my feelings as well. Once I was on the roof I waited for her to arrive. I waited...and waited...and waited, but...she never showed.

I went back downstairs, found Alya and Nino, and asked them if they've seen Marinette. That's when I found out that she had left the party.

For the next few days I called her phone and didn't get an answer. I texted and never once got a response. I was prepared for rejection that night had it ever came, but I hadn't expected not to get an answer at all.

I guess in the end it didn't matter, since Marinette told me last night that she no longer loved me. I can feel my heart breaking each time I remember her words...and yet I still hoped that she didn't mean any of it, that what she told me wasn't true.

"If it wasn't true then why would she say it?" I asked myself for what feels like the hundredth time.

"Will you stop sulking for Pete's sake?" My kwami grunts while he hovers in front of my face.

I sighed, "Plagg please, I'm really not in the mood."

"I can see that. You know your lack of optimism right now is really out of character. "

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"She said she didn't love you anymore right?" Plagg stated.

I rolled my eyes and turned away not wanting to hear it. "Plagg I know what she said the last thing I need is for you to rub it in."

"Hear me out!" He shouted, "She said she didn't love you anymore, key word being 'anymore.' So even if what she said WAS true, doesn't that mean that she loved you once before, meaning she could love you AGAIN! How is that not enough to give you hope. The fact that she was in love with another boy didn't even stop you before and who was that boy again? Oh yeah IT WAS YOU!"

I hadn't thought about that, who's to say I still don't have a chance. Despite our feelings we had a great time today and who's to say we cant still have those days. My feelings for Marinette won't change anytime soon, but I can still salvage what we had and maybe one day...it can grow into something more.

"You're right Plagg, I'm not going to lose hope." I said smiling.

"Good, now if you dont mind I would like my payment for helping you feel better. So where's my Camembert?!"

I shook my head before pointing to the nightstand dresser. "Go nuts." He phased through and I chuckled hearing him cheer as he found the stash that I've been hiding since I got here. I stood up and headed to the living room where Nino was on the couch on his computer.

When he noticed me walk into the room he turned my way. "Hey dude, you doing alright?"

"Yeah I'm doing better I suppose." I took a seat next to him and leaned back.

"Did your confession to Marinette really go that badly?" Nino knew how I felt about Marinette for awhile now. Before I realized it myself he had teased me about it until I had finally confessed that it was true. He knew the week before the New Year's Ball that I was going to tell her and that I had planned to try again when I came back from England.

"Well yeah it wasn't entirely what I was hoping for, but I'm not going to give up." I give a smile to show that I'm determined. "I just need a chance to talk to her without her running away from me."

"That's the spirit dude!" Nino says patting my back. "Hey maybe you'll get a chance this weekend. You're coming to Kim's Congratulations party right?"

"Kim's Congratulations party?"

"Yeah, he got picked to represent France in the next Olympics!"

"Wow that's awesome of course I'm going." I think for a second. "Um...so you said Marinette will be there too."

"Yeah, I don't she'll skip out on it since it's supposed to be for one of our friends, but giving how she's been acting, you might have a hard time finding her since she'll most likely be trying to avoid you."

I sighed and rested my face in my palms. Just my luck to fall madly in love with a woman who constantly avoids confrontation.

~~~~~~~~~

It's been a couple of hours since I've arrived at this party and still no sign of Marinette. Ive talked to Kim and congratulated him on making the Olympics, I've seen Rose, Juleka, Ivan, Mylene, and Max, but still nothing from Mari. I wanted to ask Nino, but he's currently at the DJ stand providing the music for this event.

Everything was already in full swing as people were dancing, drinking, and just having a good time. I'm on my third drink at the moment and I can already feel myself getting a little tipsy, but I'm still sober for the most part. I've been so focused on trying to talk to Marinette that I haven't even really been able to fully enjoy myself.

When I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't see Marinette at this party, I felt someone's finger tap me on my shoulder. I turned around and standing behind me was Alya.

"Hey." She greeted, "I just got here and Nino told me you might've been looking for Marinette."

"Yeah, did she just arrive too?" I asked.

"No, she's been here for about an hour, I forgot Kim's gift back at the apartment so I had to run back to pick it up."

"Do you know where she is?"

Alya looked over to the side. "Yeah...,but she's probably not in the best condition to talk..."

"Oh...okay..." She doesn't talk to me, but I guess I should of expected that.

"No not like that...let me show you what I mean." We walked over to the other side of the room and found Marinette with Alix, Rose, Juleka. She was laughing very loud and could barely stand in the same spot. Along with Alix, she was completely wasted. "She's been like that since I got here, she doesn't normally drink that much, honestly I think she should go home."

"Adrien!" Marinette charged for me in my direction and I caught her in my arms before she went tumbling for the floor. "You came! Theeeere's something I want toooo tell yooou."

Her speech was very slurred and because of how intoxicated she was, she probably didn't remember that she was originally trying to avoid me. Yet, despite her very drunken state I can't deny how beautiful she looks in her dress and with her hair down and how great it feels to have her in my arms right now.

"I can take her back if you want." I offered. "I'm all partied out and you just got here Alya. You should go ahead and have some fun."

"Are you sure?" She asked while watching Marinette cling to me.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I don't want her to get hurt.."

"Okay, well here." She handed me Marinette's keys. "Those are to the car and the other is for our apartment. I'll ride back with Nino after the party is over."

I nodded and proceeded to help Marinette outside, she could barely walk straight, but eventually we made it. With no one around Tikki and Plagg came out of their hiding places.

"Is she okay?" Tikki asked concerned.

"She's fine." I assured her, "She just needs to get back home and rest it off for awhile."

"Are you okay?" She asked directing the question to me.

I sighed knowing exactly what she meant, "I'm fine, I guess things are just a bit rocky at the moment." I looked over to Mari who had a dazed stare. "I'm pretty sure now's not the best time to talk to her since she's not exactly in control of her actions or won't remember any of this tomorrow morning."

"He's not giving up that easy sugarcube, trust me." Plagg said. "Adrien's here is going to woo her even more than before...well if she doesn't fall face first into the ground that is..."

_We danced the night away, we drank too much_

_I held your hair back when_

_You were throwing up_

It wasn't too far of a drive back to Marinette's apartment and surprisingly I remembered the way there. Once we were there I carried her to the door and we both entered the apartment.

When I set Marinette down, she leaned over against the wall and placed her hand on her head. "I...I don't feel so good..." Suddenly she ran to the other side of the apartment and went around the corner. I ran after her and came around that same corner to find that there was a door there and inside was the bathroom.

Marinette was bent over the toilet and currently vomiting most likely due from the amount of alcohol she consumed that she wasn't used to taking.

I rushed over and rubbed her back while she finished. I pulled back her hair so it wouldn't fall in or get dirtied . The smell was unbearable, and for a minute I could feel myself getting sick as well.

_Then you smiled over your shoulder_

_For a minute, I was stone-cold sober_

_I pulled you closer to my chest_

She leaned back, and started to giggle, when I kneeled next to her she looked over to me smiling and rested her head against my chest. Suddenly the smell of the vomit, her intoxicated stae, and the fact that I was a little drunk myself didn't matter anymore. I wrapped my arms around her frames and held her closer in my arms. I want this more than anything, but what can I do if she no longer has feelings for me right now?

After a few minutes, I scooped Marinette into my arms once again and carry her over to her room. I laid her down across her bed and it took a minute for me to pry her arms from around my neck. I made sure she was laying on her side before I started to make my leave from the room, at least until she had grabbed my hand.

I looked back at her, "What's wrong Marinette?"

"I want you to stay with me. Can you?" She asked.

_And you asked me to stay over_

_I said, I already told ya_

_I think that you should get some rest_

"Y..you should rest up Marinette, I'll take in the living room until Alya gets back." I assured her.

"No...I want you here, in the room with me." She started tugging me towards her and that's when I realized what she may have been hinting at.

"We...we can't do that Marinette." I started to blush tremendously.

She looked up to me with a sadden expression and it broke my heart to see her like this even though I know it's just the alcohol talking. That still didn't stop my heart from almost bursting out of my chest at her next words though.

"Stay with me Adrien." She said again pleadingly. "I...I love you."


	7. (You) Loved Me Once

_(You) Loved Me Once_

_I knew I loved you then_

_But you'd never know_

_'Cause I played it cool when I was scared of letting go_

My heart stopped after hearing her say those words that I didn't even realize just how much I wanted to hear them until now. I felt happy, but that quickly disappeared realizing the situation I'm in right now.

"Marinette...you're drunk." I stated to her, she was intoxicated and unaware of what she was saying. As much as it hurt, I can't believe what she's telling me right now. "Besides you...said you didn't love me anymore."

"I lied...I never stopped loving you" Her face was growing red, but I don't know if it's from embarrassment or the effects of the alcohol. "I've loved you for so long..."

I feel like my chest is about to burst. I'm not sure how much more of this I can take. "You should get some rest Marinette. I'll be right out in the living room if you need me."

"I'm so sorry I hurt you, I shouldn't have lied to you." She began to cry and the sight tore my heart apart. "I wouldn't blame you if you didn't love me anymore..."

"That's not true princess." I sat back down on the bed and held her in my arms. "There's nothing in the universe that can make me stop loving you...that I swear..." I placed a kiss on the top of her forehead. "Get some rest, I promise I'll be here when you wake up."

"Promise?"

"Cat's honor." She smiled and closed her eyes and eventually drifted off to sleep, leaving me to think of what just happened.

The next morning, I woke up with a slight pain in my back and neck. Once Marinette had fully went to sleep I laid her down and went to sleep on the living room couch. Alya hadn't shown up and I didn't want to leave Marinette here alone while she was drunk in case she woke up and did something that could've gotten her hurt.

So here I am with a crick in my neck because I just love this woman too damn much and honestly I'd do it all again, as long as she was okay.

Still...I wonder if she would remember the things she said to me last night.

I hear the sound of a door opening when I look over the couch, I see Marinette sludge her way across the room and towards the kitchen, if she was aware of my presence she hasn't made it known.

I stood up from the couch and followed her into the kitchen. That's when I noticed her clothes were changes, she now wore a tank top and a set of pajama pants. Her hair was down and a little messy, but I think it made her look adorable. I wouldn't mind waking up every morning to see Mari like this.

She grabbed a cup from the cabinet then turned around to grab something else, that's when she had finally noticed me here. Her eyes widen and she shrieked, nearly tossing the cup in the air. Luckily I reached forward and caught it before any glass was shattered. Now that I think about it, maybe I should have made my presence known a little earlier.

"A..Adrien?" She stuttered out. "What are you doing here."

I sat that glass down on the nearest countertop. "I'm guessing you don't remember to much of last night huh?" I asked.

Marinette blinked, before a horrified expression appeared on her face. "D..Did you-...I mean did w..we-?"

It took me a moment to realize what she was getting at and I can feel the heat crawling to my face. "N..No! Of course not, you were drunk and not feeling well. I just drove you home and nothing else!"

Marinette seemed to calm down a bit, but I could still tell that she was a bit tense. "Did I...say anything to you last night?" She asked shyly.

That's when it was confirmed, she said remember the things she said to me last night and I can't deny that I'm disappointed.

"No..." I lied, "It's like I said...nothing happened. You were tired and you went straight to bed, I stayed to make sure you were okay since Alya wasnt home, but since you are...I'll...take my leave." I grabbed my jacket from the couch and forced a smile towards Marinette who was watching me from the kitchen entryway. "Have a nice day Marinette."

"A..Adrien wait!" I stopped and looked back at her again, she stepped forward and twiddle her thumbs together as she struggled with what she was going. "I...I...hope you have a good day."

I smiled. "Thanks, don't hesitate to give me a call if you need anything."

I love Marinette and if last night proved anything, she loved me as well, but not in the same way I felt. Doesn't loving someone mean you'd do whatever it took to be with them? Yet...it doesn't seem like Marinette wants to take that next step.

_I know I needed you_

_But I never showed_

_But I wanna stay with you until we're grey and old_

I arrived at Nino's place and knocked on the door. I was somewhat surprised when Alya opened the door, but then again...not really. There was a towel wrapped around her hair, it looked like she just showered.

"Hey Adrien." She said opening the door all the way so I could enter. "To Nino! Adrien's here!"

Nino came from around the corner with a towel wrapped around his neck and his hair looked moist as if he had also just gotten out of the shower.

"Hey Dude, you alright?" He asked.

"I could be better." I made my way over to the couch and took a seat.

Alya took a seat on the single chair nearby. "How did things go with Marinette?"

"I'm not sure.." I leaned back and stared at the ceiling. "That day I arrived and we hung out, I told her that I was in love with her, she said she didn't feel the same, but last night while she was drunk, she told me she was in love with me afterall. Then the next morning she woke up not remembering what happened.

I sighed and sat back up, "I just don't get it, I know she was drunk, but if Marinette is in love with me, why won't she give me a chance." Alya and Nino gave each other a look that caught my attention. There was something I was missing here. "Guys?"

Alya sighed, "Marinette didn't want us to tell you this, but..." she stopped mid sentence.

"Marinette saw you on the roof with Kagami that night we went to the New Year's ball." Nino finished.

"Wait...what?" Did I hear that correctly?

"She said she saw you two kissing." Alya added. "She ended up leaving early cause she thought you had moved on."

"N..No!" I stood up from my seat. "That's not what happened at all, I swear!"

That night was supposed to be special, I had invited Marinette and our friends to the ball for us to have a good time while we were on our semester break. That was also the night I wanted to ask Marinette to be my girlfriend.

I had asked her to meet me on the roof of the building before midnight, I was so nervous wondering how she'd react when I asked her. I hoped more than anything that she would say yes.

The door opened and I tool a breath to prepare myself, however when I turned around it wasn't the person I had expected.

"Kagami? What are you doing up here?"

"I noticed you heading this way, so I followed. I wanted to talk to you."

I suddenly felt concerned, "Is there something wrong?"

"No not at all." She walked up beside me and looked out at the city. "So...you're planning on confessing to Marinette tonight?"

I nodded, Kagami was one of the few I had confided to about my feelings for Marinette, mainly because I was aware of her feelings for me and didn't want it to seem like I was leading her on. She's a really great friend and I'd hate to lose her over something like that.

"Well...I wish you nothing, but happiness Adrien. If you feel that you'll achieve that with Marinette then I wish you the best of luck."

"Thank you Kagami." I smiled, "I wish for your happiness as well, maybe one day you'll find someone who is truly worthy of you."

"Hmph I doubt that." She smiled at me and took a step closer, I was caught by surprised when she leaned forward and kissed me at the corner of my lips. "Take care Adrien."

Kagami had went back downstairs and I stood at the rooftop waiting for Marinette to show up...but she never came.

"All this time I thought she stood me up." I slapped my hand on my forehead. "Gah! I'm an idiot!"

"You guys seriously need to work on your communication skills." Alya stated. "Maybe if you tell her that it was a misunderstanding."

I sighed, "I don't know, wouldn't me pouring my heart out to her benn enough to prove that I'm not hooked on Kagami. Maybe...maybe I lost my chance..."

"Come on dude, cheer up." Nino plaved a hand on my shoulder. "I'm sure things will work out, just give it time.

"Thanks, but I think I need a moment to think. I'm going to go lay down for awhile, I'll talk to you guys later." I walked over to the spare room Nino provide for me and fell on to the bed.

I can't believe it, if I had known that was the reason, I would have made more of an effort to win her over. I went to years without seeing her and we barely spoke all because I thought she didn't like me when this whole time she was hurting over seeing me with someone else.

I blew it, I really blew, there's no way I'd be able to win her over now..and yet even now I can't stop thinking about last night..

'I love you Adrien.'

Maybe there still a part of Marinette that loves me...or maybe...I'm just kidding myself...

_Just say you won't let go_

_Just say you won't let go_


End file.
